Take care of yourself

Eversince i've become a mother to my little bub, my one and only priority is him. I will do whatever it takes so long the outcome will benefit him which inevitably this did take a toll on me
I gain weight due to my low will power when it comes to food, as I always feel hungry when I breastfed him
I also tend to slightly deviated away from the beauty department, as my time to really put on all those make-up has significantly decreased to so little time sometimes I feel its worth to have a 10 minutes nap rather than be in front of the mirror and getting dolled uo
I now forgot my own recipe on mushroom soup as my time in the kitchen now is more likely used to cook his food to be freeze up

So yah, obviously these took a toll on my appearance, my hair are as flat as it can be, my clothes dont get me started on this one, if you are close to me you would realize that I usually will rotate and recycle my tops as theres only few left that I feel comfortable with

I know all of these makes me sound like a bad mother. I even hear people judging me as they keep on reading "oh my, those are sacrifices, mother does all that. If you cant do it then do be a mother at all"

Well, it is pretty simple to judge others. I know there are mothers who are able to do all of these but still looking superbly nice and skinny. *well, discard marion caunter in this.she has dozens of maids to help her*. To me you guys are real supermom. When people keep saying that mothers are superwoman, I dont think I should smile and be part of it, cause I dont think I am that at all

I am those mother who are scared to move my baby's position in the middle of the night fear that he will wake up and it will require times to put him to bed again. I am those mother where I fed my baby's his milk with my eyes almost shut down and "shu shu shu shu" were on repeat to ensure he would sleep right after milk time.

I am certainly not those who are high on whatever that can keep on playing with their little ones even at 10.30pm at night. and I certainly am not those mother who would always pujuk my bub when they put on his sulking face instead I would go and nag them, "dont be such a brat!"

I always believe that children should fear something in life. I dont quite care what is it but there must be something that they should fear. You can't let them know that they can manipulate you and they certainly cannot know that they will win all the time.

Since parenting requires two parties, a good cop and bad cop is after all the best approach. But mommy cannot be the bad cop all the time right? You know I was warned once before when I was still pregnant. A friend of mind told me, theres 2 types of father, the one that will be the one your kids fear, or the one that always complaint and tell you whatever you are doing is wrong and your approach sucks or in a layman term a good cop dad

Good cop,bad cop is okay but the role has to be on rotation. As I said earlier, mommy cannot be the bad cop forever! So it is wise to always rotate and to bear in mind whoever wearing the bad cop hat at the time, the good one should never complaint and marah them in front of the kids

But oh well, you can only plan. You can plan to train your child to sleep in a cot, you can plan for your child to be independent but both parties must agree to the plan then only it will work

I am still trying

Before you were mommy

Read this from shared FB article.

I thought I should share this as well

To Wives: Before you were mommy

I had teary eyes when I read these bit:

Ladies, there will come a day when your husband walks in the door and you do not turn around. You will be preoccupied with filling up sippy cups and wiping booties. You will shout over the running bath water, “Hey! Glad you’re home.” But it won’t mean what it used to mean. It won’t be full of eager anticipation to spend time together. It will be full of expectations to aid in the demands of the family. “Glad you’re home,” will more properly translate, “Thank God for two extra hands to help me.” And “Praise the Lord I might get five minutes alone.”

Ladies, there will come a day when you spend every last ounce of yourselves on your children. The demands of life and the babies will come before any other priority. What little of yourself you have left at the end of the day will be used to crawl into bed before someone is awake to need you again. The thought of doing anything else after the children are asleep will sound impossible and your handsome husband’s happy smile had better mean he is willing to get up with the baby and nothing more. 

The husband that once completed your heart will be just one more person who needs you. The charming things that you fell for will go unnoticed. The daily grind will become expected.

Men, there will come a time when that beautiful bride sitting next to you hasn’t showered in days. She will be at her wit’s end wearing other people’s food and poop on her clothing. She will need to hear that she is beautiful, but she won’t listen to you. She will need to know that she is still lovable, but she won’t want you near her. When you arrive home after meeting the demands of work, you will be expected to meet the demands of your family. Your wife will hear none of your exhaustion, and you will see none of hers.

Men, you will call home to ask a quick question and anticipate a two-minute conversation. Half of it will be spent listening to your wife talk to your kids. As a matter of fact, you will make it no more than a few sentences in to any conversation ever before your wife spurts out direction to your children.“Don’t climb that!” or “Don’t sit on your sister!” You will become accustomed to these outbursts, but you will forget that there was ever a time when you had her full attention.

But Ladies, when Mommy becomes your name, remember this man. Remember that you are his wife. Remember how much you love and appreciate him in this moment. Remember his dedication to your family. Remember his love and devotion to you. And then, when the days are long and you need a break, fall into his arms.

Men, remember your bride. The care and love that she has given you will soon be spilled over to your children. Her love for you will not change. Give her the grace to be enough even when she doesn’t feel like it. Remember when your days are long, hers are too. Remember her. Fall in love with her again.

Remember each other. Remember the two that made the family. Let the Lord lead you both together. Because when the days are endless and the hours short, it will only be His love who keeps you together. It will only be His mercy that gently guides your hearts as one. Hold tightly to one another, and even more tightly to the Lord. There is no greater adventure for you to experience and no greater gift than to walk through parenthood with your best friend.  You are a team. Every single day.

*taken from the blog

Dont think its the hormones that made me teary, but when I read it line-by-line, theres not even a word that I do not agree at all. 

Moms out there, give yourself a well deserved break. Find your own me time. Find time to still date your husband (I know its difficult sometimes, the thought of leaving the kids behind. If its not you, its him will feel such way), find time to be happy again. Splurge on something that you always wanted to do or buy. If people judged you for that, well you can just ignore them and keep those happy thoughts to yourself. Share your happiness with others, even when what you did was just sipping your most favorite drink at Starbucks. If the person doesnt feel it, then know for sure he/she its not worth it and dont let them ruin your happiness

Of course, it will not be an easy process. I know that for sure. 

But keep trying

Online Business: Yes or NO?

Hi,

I've been wanting to blog about my personal experiences on shopping online with IG shops. As a true believer and supporter of e-payment, I have always put my trust in online shopping. I mean why not? It's easy, less cash being in circulation (do you know that it is costly for central banks to keep on producing new notes and maintaining existing currency notes? so, e-payment pls), less hassle. Think about it, you click,browse, add to cart and wallah the item u purchased will be delivered to your door

Recently, online business has taken a new dimension where sellers begin their business with Instagram. Its cheaper, no cost to maintain your own web, no fee to be paid to e-payment service provider and easier way for customer to reach out for you. I like it. Very much. Only at the beginning

My first bad experience with IG was when items I've ordered were wrongly delivered to a different address. WA-ed the seller, she apologized and send back a new item to me. No additional charges incurred. So I cant complaint much.

Second experience, I ordered a skirt from a seller only to receive a different item. Confronted, she said it was my mistake as I said blue skirt only and i didnt mention plain blue skirt. Although I remembered correctly saying royal blue plain skirt, but I did not pursue it. Instead I purchased another skirt. The royal blue plain skirt. It ends there

Third experience, I deposited a substantial amount of money to a personal shopper(PS) to purchase my long awaited C bag.I figured this would be my dream come true,finally I have my own C. PS went to Paris, went to one store and mentioned that the item that I wanted is not available. So I told myself,it was not meant to be. I told them, its okay I dont want any other color, I just want black. Its okaylah,you can return back the money.

"NO REFUND"

My blood went upstairs! How can this happened? I tried to educate them about the meaning of refund only to find out that they will never accept any of your argument, especially if you are just plain joe! They even asked me to get other color or simply choose another model. Are you freaking kidding me?

I still have some patience in me, I gave them a month to look for my bag. They went for another trip and managed to get the bag in different color. Fear that I will not see my money forever, I agreed. But there you go again, I have to add another RM300 to my existing RM6.7k deposited to them as they said the price is different now. I hesitated and insist it cannot be FX charges as Euro showed some deterioration against ringgit. They realised that I know FX, they said C increased their price. So I insist on the receipt. They agreed!

When they returned, I received the bag but only with a different paperbag (crumpled one too). If you buy C in its specialty store, you will get every packaging in white. Instead I received the black one. I asked for the receipt. She said "eh masa we apply VAT, custom took the receipt".

WTF?

Isn't the receipt (original) will be given back to the customer and custom will only take their copy? You think I didnt know this? U think I have never done any traveling in European countries?

I was beyond angry. I let them go but I will never halalkan whatever they took from me.

My fourth experience, as I dont like the C in red color, i re-sell it to another PS. Price was agreed upon and she agreed on the amount that I will received once the bag find the new owner

She managed to sell it in a jiffy but I cant say the same about my money. I practically need to WA her everyday to bank in the money, and the money was banked in on staggered basis and took about 3 weeks to complete the whole amount

I let it go considering that maybe she has her own business model on how her money should flow. But I cannot accept it when she paid me lesser than what we agreed upon as she claimed she forgot that the agreed price was as such. So she claimed if she paid me the sum, she will only earn a little from the transaction

Well, I wasnt upset that I loss RM100 out of it. But I was so upset that IG sellers has no ethics when it comes to honoring the agreed terms and condition. It was clearly her mistake but I have to face the consequences. I told her it was not my rezeki then but I am not happy she treated me as such and I leave it to Allah for everything that happened

Another experience was with IG seller of baby stuff. I wanted to purchase a car seat for Adam, saw the promo price and texted her to confirm availability. She said its in stock and I requested for her payment details

After 2 days, she didnt reply so I texted her again only to find out that the promo price stock is no longer available. I was not happy as she confirmed to me that its in stock and I was waiting for her account no to make the payment

And I was really angry when she mentioned this "Masa I confirm tu, still in stock. But now dah habis. Lagipun sis belum bank in"

WTF again!

She lost me at "sis belum bank in"


All these experiences makes me swear that I will never buy from IG anymore. Exception to the 2 that I have always have good experience and now considered friend. Seriously guys, think before you purchase anything from them, think really hard before u transfer money to a total stranger. If you cant help it, try with smaller amount of purchase to establish trust.

For now, Im just gonna buy old school style ofshopping

Bayar for barang ada depan mata!